darth frosty
JoinedPosts by darth frosty
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172
Are You Raising An Introvert?
by darth frosty inits not easy being an introvert in an extrovert worldespecially when youre a kid.
it is even more difficult if none of the adults in the kids life recognize that the child is an introvert.
this doesnt happen only when the childs parents are extroverts, but also with introverted parents who have never understood their own introverted nature.. .
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172
Are You Raising An Introvert?
by darth frosty inits not easy being an introvert in an extrovert worldespecially when youre a kid.
it is even more difficult if none of the adults in the kids life recognize that the child is an introvert.
this doesnt happen only when the childs parents are extroverts, but also with introverted parents who have never understood their own introverted nature.. .
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darth frosty
Lessons Introverts Need to Learn to Become LeadersSome of the most successful people in the world are introverts. Here's how they became leaders!Entrepreneur and investor@johnramptonWRITE A COMMENTIMAGE: Getty ImagesA leader is best when people barely know he exists. … Of a good leader, who talks little, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: We did it ourselves. --Lao Tzu
While it might not seems so from the outset, most introverts are in an ideal position to become leaders, because of the nature of their personality. Introversion and extroversion are considered two opposing points on a scale, but in reality, everyone has certain elements of each trait.
The main difference between the two types of personalities is that introverts tend to keep to themselves, reflecting more on their own psychic conditions, while extroverts are more social, finding inspiration from the world outside themselves. Introverts make excellent leaders, not necessarily by being social, but by applying their keen thoughts, sense of reflection, and attention to detail in all their projects; as well as by forming deeper and more meaningful relationships with their cohorts (everybody knows: small talk is an introvert's anathema).
According to the Lao Tzu quote above, these qualities also contribute in the work of the best leaders. As such, we have a number of world-renowned leaders who have upended their industries just by relying on the natural advantages of being introverted, such as Barack Obama, Mark Zuckerberg, Richard Branson, and J.K. Rowling.
Lesson 1. Be vocal about accomplishments
Regardless of the quality of the work they do, introverts tend to get overlooked because they're not necessarily vocal about their accomplishments. After all, a programmer who quietly keeps to herself is not necessarily going to draw much attention, even if she produces amazing work. Introverts are famously averse to self-promotion, but are fundamentally successful at producing quality work.
This makes moving up the chain much harder. Introverts need to have a good sense of what they're good at, and be able to step up to defend their accomplishments to nab the positions they want.
Lesson 2. Foster deeper, more meaningful relationships with primary decision makers
One misconception of introverts is that they are shy, afraid of socializing, or antisocial, when in fact introverts generate more energy through self-reflection. It's not that they can't talk to people, it's that their energy levels dwindle during times of interaction.
What this means is that when introverts do form new connections, they tend to dive deeper than superficial small talk and foster more meaningful relationships with the people they talk to. This is their advantage--it allows them to relate in a memorable way to the people they talk to. And by meeting more important people in their companies and sharing their unique ideas, introverts can stand out.
Lesson 3. Apply the attention to detail and listening skills to contribute more thoughtful ideas into discussions
A common characteristic among introverts is a more refined attention to detail, and the ability to listen. As they spend so much time in their own heads, they can work out often overlooked aspects of certain projects, and follow their gut to important endpoints.
It's these qualities that make them valuable members of any team. They think and listen first, and speak second. By harnessing this innate ability in larger discussions that include different points of views, it'll be no time before the people around them start leaning in to hear more.
Lesson 4. Take time on your own to recharge, but challenge yourself socially every day
Most introverts feel at their best when they're on their own, so it's important for their well-being to have a certain amount of time in a day set aside to recharge, reflect, and bask in isolation. However, it's equally important that they take some time to challenge themselves socially and in a low-threat situations, like going out to lunch with colleagues and participating more than usual in meetings.
One rule that known introvert Marissa Mayer uses to help her get through uncomfortable social situations is by glancing at her watch, setting a time for herself, and telling herself, "You are not allowed to leave until this time. If you are still having a terrible time by this time, then you can leave." By forcing herself into that set timeframe, she is challenging herself to get over initial self-consciousness and opening herself up to the situation around her.
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I’ve applied this in my own life. When I’m at a networking event, I always set a time that I can leave. For me this is typically around 30 to 45 minutes after I get there. I can force myself to network as much as possible because I know I don’t have to do it for that long, and this has helped me get over my introvertedness.
Lesson 5. Use social media, email, and public forums to your best advantage
Introverts might not be very active socially, but what they miss out on in lost interactions, they make up for in social media. Since introverts are known to communicate better with the written word, particularly behind a screen, it's no surprise that many are extremely savvy in social networking.
Well, now's a great time to be social network savvy! Having a big list of connections and the ability to write eloquent emails has never been more effective in convincing people of your skills and talents.
Being an introvert does not mean you cannot be a leader. It simply means you need to learn to play up your strengths
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Why I have renounced Atheism and become a believer again
by cantleave ini have always said that if a god showed itself i would follow the evidence and renounce my atheism.
i have now seen enough to start believing again, i am so happy, i feel a inner contentment, when he connected with me i really knew it was him.
if you are not a believer you will not understand this, but trust me, look at the evidence, open your heart to him, let him in and your life will change for the better.
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darth frosty
I am always moved by evidence of his noodly appendage.
h
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172
Are You Raising An Introvert?
by darth frosty inits not easy being an introvert in an extrovert worldespecially when youre a kid.
it is even more difficult if none of the adults in the kids life recognize that the child is an introvert.
this doesnt happen only when the childs parents are extroverts, but also with introverted parents who have never understood their own introverted nature.. .
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darth frosty
Mannn #5 is the TRUTH!!!
I have in the last coupla years been trying to have a smile on my face instead of the RBF. Yet I still seemed to fail. Just the other day I was reading an article that said people with an open lip smile are believed to be more trustworthy than those with a closed lip smile?!?
I thought a smile was a smile...now you want me to actually part my lips SMDH!
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172
Are You Raising An Introvert?
by darth frosty inits not easy being an introvert in an extrovert worldespecially when youre a kid.
it is even more difficult if none of the adults in the kids life recognize that the child is an introvert.
this doesnt happen only when the childs parents are extroverts, but also with introverted parents who have never understood their own introverted nature.. .
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darth frosty
I’m Not A B*tch, It’s Just My Face: 7 Struggles Of Introverts With RBF
LIKE US ON FACEBOOKChronic bitch face is a plague running rampant throughout Generation-Y, and the public needs to educate itself.
Resting bitch face (RBF) can affect anyone of any race, age or class, and it is found predominantly in the female species.
Generally, we’re good f*cking people. Our genetics just screwed us on initially coming off as friendly and approachable. It’s not our fault.
RBF, combined with an introverted personality, is the absolute worst, though. We sit in the back of any room looking unenthused as hell, but introverts actually have very busy minds.
Generally, we’re very thoughtful and creative, and we’re good listeners. Unfortunately, those with RBF are damned with emitting an unapproachable, crotchety aura.
There are a lot of misconceptions about me and my people, but usually, introverts are not antisocial or automatic assh*les.
So, don’t be so quick to label the silent one with a disgusted expression as an antisocial bitch. We’re actually secretly wonderful.
Here are seven struggles only introverts with resting bitch face understand:
1. Whenever you make new friends, they always open up with, “At first, I thought you didn’t like me.”
This is typically followed by, “You’d always give me dirty looks.”
We don’t do it on purpose. We can neither help our natural facial expressions, nor can we really control them.
Or, we often get, “I didn’t know what you thought of me because you don’t really say anything.” What am I supposed to do, scream from the rooftop I think you’re alright?
Introverts excel in utilizing body language. (Hint, hint.)
2. You always get thrown the “you’re hard to read” card.
If you think about it, it makes sense. You generally keep your thoughts to yourself, and your RBF is a natural force field, blocking your true emotions from humanity.
You can be thrilled about something, but you have the same facial expression you do when you’re thinking about banging your head against the wall. You know the difference yourself, but all everyone else sees is that classic RBF.
3. Introductions are hell.
First of all, the introvert in you barely knows what to say to begin with. Then, your b*tch face radiates the “don’t want to be here or around you” vibe, making you come off 110 percent uninterested in almost every situation.
Creating an uncomfortable feeling for complete strangers is your natural talent.
4. At any point in time, someone will think you are mad at him or her.
Introverts need time alone to recharge their batteries and feel like themselves. We genuinely enjoy being alone sometimes, and it’s nothing personal.
We don’t always answer our phones right away, so chances are we’re not intentionally ignoring anyone.
Four unanswered texts and one day later, we’re walking around looking like someone just pissed in our iced latte. It can make anyone ask questions.
5. If you don’t want to look miserable, you have to make an exhausting, conscious effort.
For some odd reason, strangers think it’s totally fine to tell you it wouldn’t hurt you to crack a smile. (Yes, it would.) The introvert just responds with a fake laugh and moves along.
The line, “It’s just my face,” doesn’t really do you justice anymore. So on most occasions, we just keep it to ourselves, and besides, who really cares?
Also, the very limited number of times I’ve attempted to not have an RBF and “cracked a smile,” I felt like I looked like some creepy killer plotting my next move. It just doesn’t work, so just embrace the RBF for what it’s worth.
6. People outside of your friend group think you’re a complete snob.
Introverts are more so observers than anything else. We gather information on our surroundings and the people in them, analyze it and make ourselves feel as comfortable as we can. It just so happens we do so with a permanent scowl on our faces.
I’ve been told multiple times that I can give off the “I think I’m better than everyone else in the room” vibe, which is false in every possible way.
I’m well aware of my flaws, as one of them not being able to find the off switch to my chronic bitch face.
7. Your true emotions only come out when you’re involved with something you’re passionate about.
Like, hell yes you want to go to Taco Bell! And if some assh*le is messing with one of your best friend’s peace of mind, you have something to say about it. Debates for you are surprisingly a piece of cake, if they concern an issue you basically live to fight for.
If we show real, raw emotion in front of people, they should embrace it because it’s rare. (Unless it concerns guacamole or something because that’s always pure bliss.)
The light at the end of the tunnel? Because you seldom voice the endearing thoughts you have buried deep inside your mind, when you compliment someone, he or she automatically knows it’s genuine.
You wouldn’t say something if it wasn’t true because you don’t really say anything at all to begin with.
When you first open your mouth, people half expect you to spew a slew of passive aggressive insults formulated to sound inoffensive, but definitely are.
However, kind words coming from a silent person with RBF syndrome can really put a smile on anyone’s face, even a fellow chronic RBF.
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172
Are You Raising An Introvert?
by darth frosty inits not easy being an introvert in an extrovert worldespecially when youre a kid.
it is even more difficult if none of the adults in the kids life recognize that the child is an introvert.
this doesnt happen only when the childs parents are extroverts, but also with introverted parents who have never understood their own introverted nature.. .
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darth frosty
30 Problems That Only Introverts Will Understand
All of these problems are so true it hurts, at least in my case.
1. Practicing conversations with people you’ll never talk to.
2. When you want to cut all ties to civilization but still be on the internet.
3. When your friend wants to invite more people over, and you don’t want to sound like a bad person by saying no.
4. When spending a heavenly weekend alone means that you’re missing out on time with friends.
5. And you fear that by doing so, you are nearing ‘hermit’ status.
6. When your ride at a party doesn’t want to leave early, and no one seems to understand your distress.
7. Trying to be extra outgoing when you flirt so your crush doesn’t think you hate them.
8. That feeling of dread that washes over you when the phone rings and you’re not mentally prepared to chat.
9. When you have an awesome night out, but have to deal with feeling exhausted for days after the fact.
10. People saying “Just be more social.”
11. When you’re able to enjoy parties and meetings, but after a short amount of time wish you were home in your pajamas.
12. Staying up late every night because it’s the only time that you can actually be alone.
13. People making you feel weird for wanting to do things by yourself.
14. Having more conversations in your head than you do in real life.
15. The need to recharge after social situations.
16. People calling you out for day dreaming too much.
17. Carrying a book to a public place so no one will bug you, but other people take that as a conversation starter.
18. People interrupting your thoughts, and you get irrationally angry.
19. Having to say “I kind of want to spend some time by myself” when you have to deal with that friend that always wants to hang out.
20. When you’re asked to do a group project, and know that you’re going to hate every minute of it.
21. When you hear the question “Wanna hang out?” and your palms start to sweat with anxiety.
22. When you hear, “Are you OK?” or “Why are you so quiet?” for the umpteenth time.
23. Having visitors stay with you is a nightmare, because it means you have to be on at ALL TIMES.
24. When people stop inviting you places because you’re the one that keeps canceling plans.
25. Being horrified of small talk, but enjoying deep discussions.
26. When you need to take breaks and recharge after socializing for too long.
27. The requirement to think introspectively rather than go to someone else with your problems.
28. Not wanting to be alone, just wanting to be left alone. And people not understanding that.
29. When people mistake your thoughtful look for being shy, or worse, moody.
30. Constantly misunderstood and you know this to be true:
Raven/Lyn / animatedcookiepeople / deviantart
If you’ve a second, please share this and help your friends understand.
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172
Are You Raising An Introvert?
by darth frosty inits not easy being an introvert in an extrovert worldespecially when youre a kid.
it is even more difficult if none of the adults in the kids life recognize that the child is an introvert.
this doesnt happen only when the childs parents are extroverts, but also with introverted parents who have never understood their own introverted nature.. .
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darth frosty
Here are 50 quotes for the introvert in you:
- “I am rarely bored alone; I am often bored in groups and crowds.” ~ Laurie Helgoe
- “I have to be alone very often. I’d be quite happy if I spent from Saturday night until Monday morning alone in my apartment. That’s how I refuel.” ~ Audrey Hepburn
- “You see things. You keep quiet about them and you understand. “ ~ The Perks of Being a Wallflower
- “I’m very picky with whom I give my energy to. I prefer to reserve my time, intensity and spirit exclusively to those who reflect sincerity.” ~ Dau Voire
- “There is a tremendous difference between alone and lonely. You could be lonely in a group of people. I like being alone. I like eating by myself. I go home at night and just watch a movie or hang out with my dog. I have to exert myself and really say, oh God, I’ve got to see my friends because I’m too content by myself.” ~ Drew Barrymore
- “Silence is only frightening to people who are compulsively verbalizing.” ~ William S. Boroughs
- “I think a lot, but I don’t say much.” Anne Frank
- “People empty me. I have to get away to refill.” ~ C. Bukowski
- “Quiet people have the loudest minds.” Stephen Hawking
- “In order to be open to creativity, one must have the capacity for constructive use of solitude. One must overcome the fear of being alone.” ~ Rollo May
- “Don’t underestimate me because I’m quiet. I know more than I say, think more than I speak and observe more than you know.” ~ Michaela Chung
- “What if you love knowledge for its own sake, not necessarily as a blueprint to action? What if you wish there were more, not fewer reflective types in the world.” ~Susan Cain
- “Please kindly go away, I’m introverting.” ~ Beth Buelow, The Introvert Entrepreneur
- “Everyone shines, given the right lighting.” ~Susan Cain
- “A good rule of thumb is that any environment that consistently leaves you feeling bad about who you are is the wrong environment.” ~ Laurie Helgoe
- “Introverts crave meaning so party chitchat feels like sandpaper to our psyche.” ~ Diane Cameron
- “I am a minimalist. I like saying the most with the least.” ~Bob Newhart
- “Let’s clear one thing up: Introverts do not hate small talk because we dislike people. We hate small talk because we hate the barrier it creates between people.” ~ Laurie Helgoe
- “Originality thrives in seclusion free of outside influences beating upon us to cripple the creative mind. Be alone—that is the secret of invention: be alone, that is when ideas are born.”~ Nikola Tesla
- “The highest form of love is to be the protector of another person’s solitude.” Rainer Maria Rilke
- “When you’re an introvert like me and you’ve been lonely for a while, and then you find someone who understands you, you become really attached to them. It’s a real release.” Lana Del Rey
- “Stay true to your own nature. If you like to do things in a slow and steady way, don’t let others make you feel as if you have to race. If you enjoy depth, don’t force yourself to seek breadth.” ~ Susan Cain
- “Introvert conversations are like jazz. Each player gets to solo for a nice stretch before the other player comes in and does his solo.” ~ Laurie Helgoe
- “Introverts are word economists in a society suffering from verbal diarrhea.” ~ Michaela Chung
- “I want to be alone… with someone else who wants to be alone.” – Dimitri Zaik.
- “Our culture made a virtue of living only as extroverts. We discouraged the inner journey, the quest for a center. So we lost our center and have to find it again.” ~Anais Nin
- “Silence is beautiful, not awkward. The human tendency to be afraid of something beautiful is awkward.” ~Elliot Kay
- “After an hour or two of being socially on, we introverts need to turn off and recharge … This isn’t antisocial. It isn’t a sign of depression.” Jonathan Rauch
- “Your solitude will be a support and a home for you, even in the midst of very unfamiliar circumstances, and from it you will find all your paths.” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke
- “There’s zero correlation between being the best talker and having the best ideas.” ~Susan Cain
- “I talked to a calzone for fifteen minutes last night before I realized it was just an introverted pizza. I wish all my acquaintances were so tasty. ” ~ Jarod Kintz
- “The secret to life is to put yourself in the right lighting. For some it’s a Broadway spotlight, for others, a lamplit desk.” ~ Susan Cain
- “As a child I suppose I was not quite normal. My happiest times were when I was left alone in the house on a Saturday.” ~ Charles Bukowski
- “In terms of, like, instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin.” ~John Mulaney
- “Blessed are those who do not fear solitude, who are not afraid of their own company, who are not always desperately looking for something to do, something to amuse themselves with, something to judge.” ~ Paulo Coelho
- “I was just confused about why I was feeling overwhelmed all the time and trying to adjust to having people work for me. Surprisingly, I think if you’re known on the Internet, you’re probably an introvert.” ~ Felicia Day
- “’Come out of your shell’ – that noxious expression which fails to appreciate that some animals naturally carry shelter everywhere they go and some humans are just the same.” ~ Susan Cain
- “I don’t have time for superficial friends, I suppose if you’re really lonely you can call a superficial friend, but otherwise, what’s the point? ~ Courtney Cox
- “I owe everything that I have done to the fact that I am very much at ease being alone.” ~ Marilynne Robinson
- “[Introverts] listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. They tend to dislike conflict. Many have a horror for small talk, but enjoy deep discussions.” ~ Susan Cain
- “My imagination functions much better when I don’t have to speak to people.” ~ Patricia Highsmith
- “For introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating.” ~ Jonathan Rauch
- “Beware of those who seek constant crowds; they are nothing alone.” ~Charles Bukowski
- “I’m self-sufficient. I spend a lot of time on my own and I shut off quite easily. When I communicate, I communicate 900 per cent; then I shut off, which scares people sometimes.” ~ bjork
- “Loneliness is failed solitude.” Sherry Turkle
- A happy life must be to a great extent a quiet life, for it is only in an atmosphere of quiet that true joy dare live. ~ Bertrand Russell
- “Whatever kind of introvert you are, some people will find you ‘too much’ in some ways and ‘not enough’ in others.” ~ Laurie Helgoe
- “A wise man once said nothing.” ~ Proverb
- “Don’t think of introversion as something that needs to be cured…Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you’re supposed to.”~ Susan Cain
- “In an extroverted society, the difference between an introvert and an extrovert is that an introvert is often unconsciously deemed guilty until proven innocent.” ~ Criss Jami
Read more at http://expandedconsciousness.com/2015/04/08/50-inspiring-quotes-for-introverts/#IwWeLCwyvh3kXhhi.99 -
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Falling asleep at the meeting
by JakeM2012 inthis brings back memories.. https://instagram.com/p/0n8sxirizd/.
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https://instagram.com/p/0n8sxirizd/?taken-by=marcusastanley.
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darth frosty
I used to sleep when I was the watchtower reader...;-) -
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"Salvation" By Langston Hughes
by darth frosty in"salvation".
by langston hughes.
i was saved from sin when i was going on thirteen.
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darth frosty
Would have been 113 today Happy birthday!!! -
172
Are You Raising An Introvert?
by darth frosty inits not easy being an introvert in an extrovert worldespecially when youre a kid.
it is even more difficult if none of the adults in the kids life recognize that the child is an introvert.
this doesnt happen only when the childs parents are extroverts, but also with introverted parents who have never understood their own introverted nature.. .
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darth frosty
What you should know before moving in with an introvert
Leave me alone sometimes or I turn into a crabby cow, says Wendy Squires. Photo: Stocksy
Looking back on my most enduring relationship, lasting nearly a decade, I see where I have been going wrong since.
My ex and I were young and in love, saving to scrape together our first piece of real estate, which ended up being a run-down cottage we adored. In between swooning about pressed metal ceilings (rusted, but that's another story) and the tiny established garden out back, I spied what was really the most attractive part of the home for me – a small spare room.
You see, I am an introvert. I like people, and most of the time I enjoy socialising. I just need time to recharge after being around others and that means being alone.
Wendy Squires: "I'm an introvert. I need time to recharge." Photo: Mike Baker
While extroverts re-energise in company, it can only happen for me in solitude. Without it, I tend to wilt. Okay, I turn into an unhinged harridan, similar to when woken mid-REM sleep by a dreaded, chirpy, morning person telling me I'm missing the so-called "best part of the day".
ADVERTISEMENTI need time alone, damn it, and if I don't get it, those closest to me, especially a beleaguered beloved, likely will. It's not as if I want to be a crabby cow, it's just that I've learnt through trial and error that if I become deprived of alone time I become devoid of patience. (Just as well I'm not a mother, I hear you rumble. Don't worry, I agree!)
The other thing I've realised is necessary for me to remain rational in relationships is to retain an element of mystery. When I have a clothing crisis and pull out dozens of outfits while crying that I have nothing to wear, I don't need anyone to witness my madness or ask me what was wrong with the first choice.
Just like when I sit back on a Sunday night in a mud face mask, enjoying the gross pleasure of scraping dry skin off my heels, I prefer to do so in private. So far, any man I've known who has witnessed this event readily agrees it's best kept to a one-hander. Hence, my passionate penchant for a room away from view. And for many years, that tiny room in that creaky old cottage, with its fold-out couch and funky desk I found in a council clean-up, was my sanctuary.
As much as I loved curling up in that safe, soft place where my man's arm met his shoulder, when he wanted to sleep and I wanted to read, potter, answer emails and/or toss and turn at will, that spare room was a godsend. Just as when that man of my dreams was snoring (why is the volume always louder when they've been at the pub?) and passing wind with the unmistakable odour of kebab, it was nice to pad off down the hall to the other room, one that didn't smell like old RSL carpet or sound like gravel in a blender.
Apart from saving fights, I also believe having personal space enhanced our romance. In all the years I lived with my partner, despite the spare room, we rarely slept apart. But if we did fall asleep away from each other, a quiet tap on the door asking can we snuggle was always warmly welcome - a choice rather than a given. And sex seemed spicier, away from the predictability of the same old bed.
Now, whenever my girlfriends tell me they're moving in with a man, the first thing I suggest is they commandeer a room to themselves if they can, or at least have a bolthole to hide and indulge in secret women's business. If there's somewhere you can be alone to just do whatever it is you need, I reckon your relationship, and peace of mind, will be a lot healthier for it.
You see, when we bought that house, it also had a backyard shed, which was immediately seized by my partner, also an introvert. There, he would hide and renew, ruminate, relax and write, allowing me to do the same.
We both understood the importance of privacy and space. And we both wanted our relationship to work, long-term. And for my longest while, it did.
